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| Winter quarter ended. Didn't pass Chemistry 14D.
Spring quarter ended. Didn't pass Math 3C.
Summer began. I'm in Korea. :]]
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So I guess I should finally get my act together. I really, honestly, earnestly haven’t been trying in school as much as I should. I coasted through my first year - the only class I worked my ass of in was LS2, and that got me a B-. Since then, I’ve just had no drive, no motivation, my excuse me I don’t intend on going to Med School, so grades don’t count that much. Korean and WAC classes have been keeping my GPA floating above a 3.0, and I only need a 2.0 to enter into the MIMG major, so what’s the deal? Why does it matter?
I’m a person who constantly compares themselves to other people. I don’t need to be the best, the number one, the top of the class, but to feel good about myself, I need to be up there. Every time I check a test score and see my grade in the the second or third to last column of the grading scale, it sucks, but I’ve been able to shrug it off. I think this is pretty much the lowest grade and worst score I’ve ever gotten so far in college relative to the rest of the class. That 46% ranked me 171/195. I know I can do better than that. It’s a waste of my time, a waste of my parent’s money, and waste of opportunity.
I can go to city college on my own time for less money to fail classes. How many people get the opportunity to study at UCLA? Not to mention I feel like I half-assed my way in to begin with. I didn’t try that hard in high school, I relied on extra-curricular activities, and I used dance to get in. Could I have gotten in on grades alone? Hell no. I want to prove that I’m not dumb. I need to not be lazy. I need to believe in myself and stop accepting average. I need to stop justifying that it’s okay because everyone in these classes is premed. I just need to stop; no more excuses. | | |
| Well, 2009 is here, and so is the winter quarter. I actually can't believe it's going by so quickly already. It's week three, and that means we're already 1/5 of the way done with the quarter! Such madness. I already feel rushed and stressed and all that good stuff, which is hard to believe since it's only been two weeks since I've been back. I still need to make new years resolutions for 2009. I decided to give myself until February to make them, so I can really think about them and figure out if they're actually ones that I can accomplish instead of writing a whole bunch of unattainable dreams, since.. that's just a waste of time, and then you just feel guilty for no reason because you aren't following these goals that were set too high. Wow that was a really pessimistic statement. Maybe I should go think about that now while I study... and then think about a recap of 2008. :] | | |
| Apparently Intermediate Korean, Calculus, and Molecular Biology heard me shit talking about Chemistry Lab and have decided to join forces... and jointly pwn me. Touche', finals... touche`. You win again. GG.
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| GOOD GAME, CHEMISTRY LAB. BUT FOR ONCE, I WILL BE OWNING YOU, MOTHER TRUCKER! MUAHAHA.
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